Still Chosen
by artemis lecter
Summary: Takes place after 'Chosen'. What happened after they left the big hole that used to be Sunnydale?


Disclaimer: I don't own Buffy. Thank you for reminding me.

A/N: All Buffy's POV. Takes place right after 'Chosen'. Kinda sappy. Please review!!!

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I boarded the bus with the rest of the group, my friends . . . and the new Slayers. It felt so weird, not to be only one of two Slayers in the whole world. It would probably take some getting used to, although I didn't mind that I would probably not have to wash so much blood out of my clothes.

I looked around. Most of my friends were here; we had lost Anya. I felt terrible. We had never really bonded, but she was one of us, one of the Scoobies. I felt certain that she would have been proud of herself, and happy with the way she went out, protecting someone else. She had learned to be human after all. Xander was crying softly a few seats in front of me. I knew how he felt.

Faith and Robin sat near the front of the bus, snuggling close together. I felt a smile tug at my lips. It was good that Faith had finally found someone. She would deny it for a while, but she loved him. I saw her face from outside the bus when she thought he was dead; she was horrified and agonized in her own "I don't really care" kind of way.

Willow and Kennedy were also making with the cuddling. There was another relationship that I was glad had worked out. Tara's death had left willow almost devastated and almost killed her; I was glad that she was finally happy, after so much suffering. Kennedy glanced at me, as though she had sensed me staring at her (and she very well may have). She smiled at me, and I grinned back at her. She didn't necessarily like me; as a matter of fact, out of everyone on that bus she probably liked me the least. But we understood each other. Must be a slayer thing.

There were, of course, fewer Potentials (now Slayers) than we had arrived with. We had lost several. I felt so sad, and guilty that as I looked around I couldn't even tell which of the girls had lost their lives. I should have paid more attention. The night Dawn kicked me out of my house came to mind. I thought back to then, and realized that although I had been right, so had they. After years of battling demons and vampires and hell-gods, after all the losses, I had been willing to do just about anything to beat the bad guys. Part of me blamed my resurrection last year; being yanked out of eternal paradise had been hard to bounce back from. But yet another part of me knew that I had been losing myself since long before then. It seemed that the more demons I fought, the more demonic I became. For a while, it seemed like I had completely lost my humanity. It was going to be hard to reconnect with my friends, just be able to hang out like normal people. I wished to be sixteen again. I wanted to remember what it felt like to try to hold on to Buffy the teenager and not to become only Buffy the vampire slayer. I had lost that a long time ago.

Funny . . . the only person who had made me feel like Buffy instead of the Slayer lately had been Spike. I was glad of the friendship that I had had with him. He really had always been there for me.

I wiped a tear off my cheek. It was stupid that I should cry for him, really. He was the one person who had always managed to piss me off no matter how good a mood I was in. He had tried to kill me for years. But the last couple of months . . . I had never been that close to anyone, never felt a connection like that with anyone. Not even Angel. Spike had always been there, even before he fell in love with me. He was the only on e on my side when I got into that fight with my friends. He was the reason I got up and fought Caleb, the reason the Potentials had become Slayers. He was the reason the Earth was still turning. And regardless of what he had said, didn't give up his life for the world. He gave it up for me, just like he always said he would. Everything he did, he did for me. He got his soul because I wanted him to. He stayed for me. He did it all because he loved me.

I wished he was there on the bus, silently rejoicing with the rest of us. He deserved to be here. And maybe is I told him I loved him again, maybe this time he would believe me. Tears streamed down my face freely now. I missed him so much.

Suddenly, Faith appeared at my side. She sat on the seat next to me and put her arm around me.

"Hey, B," she said. I was slightly surprise by the concern that marred her features. She wasn't really one to be sympathetic about other people's problems.

"Hey," I replied. My voice sounded tired.

"Y'know, everyone else up there is pretty damn happy. With the exception of Xander, of course," she said, looking over at our friend. He was still crying, shaking slightly. "What's with the waterworks?"

I shrugged. I wasn't really sure I wanted to share my feelings at the moment. Faith, however, seemed to understand.

"He loved you," she said. "he gave everything up to save you." I felt another tear roll down my cheek.

"I loved him so much," I whispered softly, choking on the words slightly. Faith didn't look surprised. I had a hunch that she had suspected this for a while.

"He didn't believe me when I told him."

Faith gave me a hug then. Her relationship with Robin must have made her more touchy-feely. I didn't mind. If anything, I was grateful that she cared.

"I'm sorry," she said as she pulled back. She knew what it felt like to lose someone. I was glad to have here there.

"On the plus side," she said, attempting to lighten the mood, "the world's still here. Everything else is five by five."

I smiled. She was right about that.

"Any idea where we're going now?" I asked.

Faith shook her head. "Giles says we're gonna stop in about twenty minutes for food, and we'll talk it out then."

Sure enough, twenty minutes later we were pulling into McDonalds and ordering thirty double cheeseburgers with fries. We all crowded around several tables, eating our food and waiting for Giles to talk. I managed to get a seat next to Xander.

"How are you?" I asked. He gave me a look. He put his head in his hands.

"I don't . . . I don't know what to do without her here," Xander said. "Things were getting so good . . . ya know, as good as our lives can get." I smiled at that. He definitely had a point.

"I really am sorry, Xand," I said, giving him a hug. "We're all gonna miss her." I felt him shaking in silent sobs again. "I think she would have been happy with the way she died though."

Xander smiled. "Yeah. Me too."

Giles cleared his throat. Everyone's attention focused to the center of the group, waiting for him to speak.

"Well, quite obviously there is quite a bit of work to be done." He spoke quietly so that the other customers and employees could not hear.

"There are now Slayers all over the planet, unaware of their power and their birthright. Our job now is to find these girls and train them."

"What about Watchers?" one of the girls piped up. "There aren't any left."

"Well . . . I was planning to make another one."

Willow and I, sitting across from each other, looked at each other, interested.

"What's the plan?" I asked.

"Several of us should continue to look for the new Slayers. The new Slayers still have quite a bit of training to do, so the Watchers will be helping with that. Each Watcher will probably have several Slayers."

"Who are the Watchers?" Andrew asked.

"Willow, Xander, Robin, and myself," Giles answered. "For now."

Willow looked slightly worried. "Me? A Watcher?" she asked Giles. He nodded.

"You'll be fine," he reassured her. I nodded enthusiastically. I knew she would make a fantastic Watcher. Xander looked pleased with himself at being chosen for this responsibility as well. I wasn't offended that I didn't get picked; Giles knew I would rather find the other Slayers.

"Now, Buffy and Faith should probably search for Slayers. They will be best at helping them come to terms with their new life."

"Kennedy should probably go too," Faith said. "She doesn't really need the training any more."

Giles thought for a moment, then nodded. "If that's what she wants."

Kennedy looked at Willow for a moment, clearly wanting to go but afraid to say so in case that wasn't what Willow wanted. Willow, however, nodded.

"Go. You'll love it." Kennedy grinned, silently thanking her.

"All right, that's settled. Now, the Watcher's Counsel should probably be set up in England, for the sake of resources and such. I think we'll start there with the search for the Slayers." Everyone nodded in agreement.

"Better get moving quick," Robin said. "Sound's like we're going to be busy for a while."

Everyone got up and dumped their trash in the garbage can, heading once more out to the bus.

I felt someone tap my shoulder. Turning around, I saw that Giles was standing behind me.

"Hey," I said.

"How are you?" he asked, paternal concern once again evident on his face.

I shrugged. "Good. Better than I've been in a while." I smiled. "Just feels weird."

Giles nodded in understanding. "I imagine we'll all have to get used to some things. Such as how I'm going to rebuild the Watcher's Counsel." He sighed. "This could be difficult."

"We'll be fine. We always are." I smiled.

Giles put his arms around me and gave me a hug. I grinned, glad to know that he still cared about me after the way we had treated each other the last few months. We pulled apart, both of us smiling.

"Shall we?" he asked, motioning to the bus. I nodded.

"Lets."

I had no idea how things were going to turn out. I didn't know if the people standing on the bus with me were going to be there five years from then. I didn't know how he loss of my friends over the last few years was going to affect me in the years to come. All I knew was there were still things to be done in the world, and I honestly wasn't ready to take a break until they had been done. I refused to let my friend's death's be meaningless.

I was still a chosen one.


End file.
